Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
