I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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