I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
