it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
