haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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