he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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