Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
