So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
