ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Last time i carry you out of a forest
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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