Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
