it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
