Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
