do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
