I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize
