I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
