Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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