Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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