I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
