I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I'm drive I can fine osifer
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
