He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
