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• (831): View more from California

  dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.

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• (940): View more from Texas

  This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing

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• (406): View more from Montana

  well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  Thanks, mom, will do

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