went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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