just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
