he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
