So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Randomize
