why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
