Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize