i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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