just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize