Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Your tits are I can't wait for
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Drunk walkin through police station. America
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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