well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
