As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
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