so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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