Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Randomize
