the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
