we have officially lost it.
I wish I could teleport
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize