I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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