Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
