he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
