VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
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I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
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i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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