no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
