Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
