I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I think people are normalizing furries
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
