literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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