Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
