Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
