hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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