walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
