you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
