I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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